Hella Good Livin

Tonya and Erin chat about being a “hypewoman” and why women supporting women matters emotionally, psychologically, and physically. They share small moments- complimenting a waitress, encouraging a nervous friend in a new role, and discuss why many women were raised to keep praise and vulnerability internal. Erin explains research contrasting men’s “fight or flight” with women’s “tend and befriend,” noting that bonding during stress can trigger oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin and help regulate the nervous system. They connect strong female friendships with health benefits and longevity, reflect on loneliness in midlife and how caregiving and cognitive decline can disrupt social ties, and emphasize reciprocity, honest friendship, and reinvention through divorce, career change, and empty nesting. They end with a two-part challenge to text specific encouragement and use social media to counter negativity with supportive comments.

Erin and Tonya talk over margaritas about dating in your 50s, how apps feel like “window shopping,” and why meeting organically is hard. They share divorce experiences, carrying the load, and how healing and therapy shape new non-negotiables: effort, support, peace, and not being dysregulated. They discuss red flags (badmouthing exes, bare minimum behavior), updating app profiles, and meeting people through “third places” like gyms, hobbies, and coffee shops. Key takeaway: protect your peace, don’t settle, and build a full life first.